I love you...
June 29, 2003 at 4:20 PM

Eric,

I love the way you smiled and waved at me today. It was different, like you genuinely were happy to see me...thanks.

Well, you're gone now...off to Mexico. Please be safe. I know it's only a week, but I will miss you. I hated seeing you go, but at the same time, saying goodbye felt good. I got to hug you and hold on to you for just a minute. I let my face rest against your neck, and I could have stayed there forever. I hated that you had sunglasses on, because I couldn't see your eyes, and I wanted to.

And your hair...YOU CUT IT! And it looks goooood. I could have spent all day today just looking at you. You amaze me. I loved the long hair that was starting to curl at the ends, and flipped out underneath your backwards baseball cap...But I love the way it looks now too. You look so handsome...

Oh....Hurry back...

And Dwayne, I have to tell you something. I know you'll never read this, but thank you. I forget how good it can feel when someone tells you they love you. You apologized for teasing me about the coffee, (will I ever live it down??)and told me never to take your teasing seriously. You felt bad. "because I love you so much," you said. And I felt so good, because I love you so much too. And it was great to hear you say it. You've never said that before. (Now if only I could get your son to feel the same... :) Well, we'll see...)

Dwayne, thank you for being such a joy to me. I think you have to be one of the most wonderful, sweet, caring souls I have ever known, and I am so blessed to know you.

To explain part of the reason I am so close with Dwayne, i have to talk about Easter. At church we had a big bridge built to parallel the stage. It tied into all the parts of the message and we got to sing standing on it, and it was great. Tim, (the pastor) talked about starting a relationship with God as being as easy as crossing over a bridge, a bridge with no toll, and that all you have to do is decide simply to cross it. (A great metaphor...) So at the end, to wrap it all up, he invited all the people to cross the bridge. We were tearing down the equipment and the thought never really crossed my mind to do it. But then I was standing and talking to some people, and Dwayne asked me if I had gone over the bridge yet, and when I said no, Dwayne asked me to go with him. (Everyone was going with their families, but my family doesn't go to my church) So we went up the stairs and he reached for me. I linked my arm in his getting ready to walk, and he had me let go of his arm, and took my hand instead. And we walked across the bridge. When we got to the other side, he smiled and gave me a great big hug. I think that was a big moment of bonding for us, and I have felt really close to him ever since.

We have some family problems in common, and our personalities are very close, but something is just so gentle and sweet about him that I can't help but love him. Who knows, he may be my future father-in-law...wouldn't that be great...He has also pushed me to take my music further, then he apologizes for "being a jerk" and tells me he'll back off if I want him to...hee hee...He's been so supportive and he makes me feel more confident. Like I can do anything because he says I can, and I believe I can.

Like I said, I am blessed to have him in my life. Who knew I would someday be close friends with a 40 year old...God’s great isn’t he?

Well, thanks for listening, I forgot how good it felt to write in here. I plan to be back more often. Thanks to those who missed me!

I love you. I love you. I love you.