Full in Joy...
January 21, 2003 at 11:15 PM

I am having one of those loving, excited, happy, joyous, can't stand how happy I am nights. God, music is just so wonderful. I don't know how to tell you...

Everytime we sing sets like this that are just my favorites, and I can feel so free and dance and show my light, and be so full of life, and have no boundaries, I get so excited. So desperate for the future that will come to be.

I get excited, because I can se visions of things to come...not real visions, but, images in my head. How I want things to be, what it will look like, sound like, feel like...I already feel it. It's been in my heart for 20 years, it's been in my spirit for all of time, and will be for an eternity. What a beautiful joy I have inside me. What a wondrous world I have been opened to. What a beautiful life. Don't let those few entries where I complain, or get down ever confuse you. Everybody gets down, but I am so HAPPY. I am so in love with life and music, and these people, and all the oppurtunities, and with each day. To be alive. Everything is a blessing.

I feel so good. I couldn't be any higher. I couldn't feel any better. I can't wait to touch them. I can't wait to reach them, know them, love them. It's all laid out before me, i chose this. I chose it, I planned it, God shaped it, and that's why it's so perfect.

To be alive is an amazing joy.

I love you.